Babywearing isn’t just a "parenting hack." It is a lifesaver. It is the bridge between the intense needs of a newborn and the practical realities of life, and this goes double or triple if you have another tiny human or two (or three...) running around. Whether you are navigating the first few weeks or seeking natural birth support and a smooth transition into parenthood, wearing your baby allows you to keep that "tender, peaceful bond" while reclaiming your hands. But, like anything worth doing, it comes with a learning curve. I remember the first time I tried a long wrap; I felt like I was trying to wrap an entire bedsheet around me and ended up looking more like a mummy than supermum. But once you master the safety basics, you move from "I hope I'm doing this right" to "I got this." Why We Wear: The Heart of BabywearingBefore we dive into the "how," let’s talk about the "why." Beyond the sheer convenience of being able to eat a sandwich with both hands, babywearing offers profound physiological and emotional benefits:
The T.I.C.K.S. Rule: Your Safety CompassWhen it comes to safety, we don't guess. We follow a clear, actionable framework. The T.I.C.K.S. rule is the gold standard for ensuring your baby’s airway is protected and their spine is supported. T : Tight The carrier or wrap should be snug enough to hold your baby firmly against you. Think of it as a "firm hug." If the fabric is too loose, your baby might slump down, which can restrict their breathing. A good test? If you lean forward and your baby pulls away from your body, it’s time to tighten things up. I : In View at All Times You should always be able to see your baby’s face just by looking down. Ensure no fabric, clothing, or even your own hair is covering their nose or mouth. We want to see those sweet, sleepy snuggles clearly! C : Close Enough to Kiss This is my favorite rule. Your baby should be positioned high enough on your chest that you can easily kiss the top of their head by just tipping your head forward. If they are sitting too low on your belly, they aren't properly supported, and it will eventually put a strain on your back, too.  K: Keep Chin Off Chest This is vital for airway safety. A newborn’s head is heavy, and their neck muscles are weak. If their chin is forced down onto their chest, it can partially close their airway. Ensure there is always a space of at least one to two finger-widths under their chin. S : Supported Back In an upright carry, the baby should be held comfortably close to the wearer so their back is supported in its natural "C-curve" position. Their tummy and chest should be against you, not twisting away. Mind the Hips: The Magic "M" PositionBeyond the airway, we also care deeply about those tiny growing joints. For the first few months, a baby’s hips are quite flexible, and improper positioning can increase the risk of hip dysplasia. We look for the "M" Shape (often called the "froggy" position).
When you look at your baby in the mirror, their legs and bottom should form a wide "M." This keeps the ball of the hip joint nestled deeply into the socket, allowing for healthy development.  You Are Not Alone in the "Wrap Struggle"If you’ve watched a YouTube tutorial five times and still feel like you’re wrapped in swaddling clothes, please know that you are not alone. There is no need to feel frustrated or like you "just aren't a babywearing person." Sometimes, you just need a gentle guide to show you the way. As you can see, while we are beyond the carrying stage now, babywearing was a part of my family's life with littles from the beginning! While there are definitely better carriers for dads now, (No Magic M in sight! 😬) you can see my husband did his share of babywearing.  I loved using ring slings, though they definitely have a learning curve. A huge pro for ring slings is the ease of "unwearing" a sleeping baby. Compared to other carriers that require you to lift baby out or unwind yourself like a spinning doll, ring slings make it easy to transition your sleeping little one. Once baby is asleep, you can lay baby and sling down at the same time, and ease yourself out, letting baby sleep with the thin fabric underneath her. Remember when wearing baby in the sling: keep one hand on or around baby at all times and make sure to keep her face where you can see it.  I was also a huge fan of the Boba brand carrier. It was very comfortable for use and made safe kitchen tasks or housework easy to do with baby in tow. For older babies who can back carry, it is a great option for hiking.
This stretchy wrap was one of the last types of carriers I used. Though definitely trickier to put on, this type of carrier spreads the baby's weight over your whole back which is quite comfortable.  If you need help choosing and learning to use baby carriers, this is where our postpartum doula services really shine. At St. Croix Birth & Parenting, we don’t just "help with the baby": we empower you to care for your baby with confidence. Our doulas can come to your home (or meet via telehealth) to help you master your specific carrier, whether it’s a ring sling, a stretchy wrap, or a structured buckle carrier. We’ll check your T.I.C.K.S., ensure that "M" shape is perfect, and help you find the "sweet spot" where both you and baby feel light as air. We also love seeing families at our Baby Sign Play classes and parent groups! It’s a wonderful place to see other parents wearing their babies and realize that we are all just learning together, one step at a time.
A Final Reminder: Your Story MattersAs you navigate these early days, remember that your baby doesn’t need a "perfect" parent: they just need you. They need the sound of your voice, the warmth of your skin, and the rhythm of your heart. Whether you wear your baby for ten minutes while you fold some onesies or for two hours while you go for a peaceful walk, you are providing them with a sanctuary of love. You are doing a beautiful job, mama (and papa!). These days are fragile and joyful all at once. If you ever feel overwhelmed by the fog of new parenthood, reach out. We are here to support you, pray for you, and celebrate every small victory with you. Do you have a favorite carrier that has been a lifesaver for you? Or are you still trying to find the right fit? Share your journey in the comments below (I'd love to hear your story!)
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THE VITAL "NEONATAL WINDOW"
TIPS FOR A STRONG START IN THE FIRST MONTHGetting off to a strong start requires some key concepts: a good latch, frequency, and, most importantly, your own care so you can heal and regain your strength and build an abundant milk supply. 1. Focus on the Latch A good latch shouldn't be agonizing. Yes, there might be some initial "tender" moments as your nipples get used to the sensation and the stretching, but if you feel sharp or "squashing" pain, it’s a sign to gently break the seal and try again. Aim for a "deep" latch where the baby takes in a good portion of the areola, not just the nipple. 2. Embrace the "Ecological" Rhythm Many families I work with across the globe, and throughout the Twin Cities, St. Paul, Minneapolis, Stillwater, Woodbury, Hudson, and the St. Croix Valley are especially interested in ecological breastfeeding as one of our unique offerings. This isn't just about food; it’s a lifestyle of mother-baby togetherness. By following the "Seven Standards", which include frequent nursing, avoiding artificial nipples (pacifiers/bottles), sharing sleep, babywearing, and avoiding separations from your baby, many mothers find that this "attachment parenting" style of breastfeeding actually helps to avoid common breastfeeding difficulties, like low milk supply and engorgement -- and the plugged ducts and mastitis that often follow. And this natural way of breastfeeding suppresses the reproductive hormones in many women, spacing children naturally. It’s about working with your body’s design. 3. Maternal Care is Not Selfish You cannot pour from an empty cup. To make milk, you need calories, hydration, and, as much as possible, rest. I know, "sleep when the baby sleeps" feels like a joke when the laundry is staring at you or your toddler is asking you to read The Cat in the Hat for the fiftieth time. But in this first month, give yourself permission to let the house be a bit ~ or a lot! ~ messy and ask for help, including care of any older siblings. Your job is to care for yourself so you can heal from the beautiful but strenuous work of birth and to care for the new little human in your life. Breastfeeding is a full-time job! Finding Your Village: Support GroupsBreastfeeding is not meant to be done in isolation. Historically, women had sisters, mothers, and aunts surrounding them. Today, we have to be more intentional about creating that circle. At St. Croix Birth & Parenting, we offer two very special spaces for this, both available to families in the Twin Cities metro and St. Croix Valley and around the world who are looking for connection:
If you're looking at the upcoming schedule and wondering where to begin, the Breastfeeding Matters class is a lovely first step, especially for expectant and newly postpartum families in St. Paul, Minneapolis, and surrounding Twin Cities communities. (But since it's a virtual class, you can join from anywhere!) When You Need a Little Extra HelpSometimes, despite our best efforts, challenges arise. Maybe it's a tongue-tie, a slow weight gain, or just a feeling of being overwhelmed. This is where professional support can make all the difference. If you are struggling, please don't wait until you are at a breaking point. A breastfeeding consultation can provide the technical guidance and emotional reassurance you need. We can meet in person throughout the Twin Cities, including Minneapolis, St. Paul, and nearby communities, or virtually if you're further away. Additionally, our postpartum doula services are designed to mother the mother. Imagine someone coming into your home to hold the baby so you can shower, or to fix you a nutritious snack while we talk through your breastfeeding goals. It's about providing that "gentle guide" during the transition into parenthood. A BLESSING FOR YOUR FIRST MONTHTo the mama sitting there right now, perhaps with a sleepy baby on her chest: Your body is doing a miraculous thing. Whether your journey feels like a peaceful stream or a turbulent river right now, know that you are the perfect mother for your child. In these first 30 days, remember you can SUCCEED when you breastfeed:
You’ve got this, mama. And when it feels like you don't, we are right here to hold your hand. I’d love to hear from you: What has been the most surprising part of your first 30 days? Or, if you’re still waiting for baby’s arrival, what is the one thing you’re most looking forward to (or nervous about) with breastfeeding? Share with us in the comments! 
Now that it's May, Healthy Vision Month, I wanted to take some time, as part of our News about Newborns series, to chat about the miracle of your baby’s developing sight in the first 28 days of life. This neonatal period is not just about biology; it’s about the very first conversations you’ll ever have, while you are also healing, adjusting, and finding your footing as a mother. THE "MURKY" WATERS OF NEWBORN VISIONWhen you first bring your baby home, their world is a bit of a blur. If you’ve ever felt like your newborn is looking through you rather than at you, don't worry, you aren't imagining it! At birth, a baby’s visual system is still under construction. Their retinas aren't fully developed, and the neural pathways between their eyes and brain are just beginning to fire up. A newborn can only see clearly about 8 to 15 inches away from their face. If that distance sounds familiar, it’s because it is exactly the distance between your face and theirs while you are cradling them for a feeding ~ or a snuggle; Dad's face is equally interesting! Isn't it beautiful how God designed it that way? Even when their vision is limited, they are biologically "hardwired" to see the people who love them most.
EYE CONTACT AS THE FIRST SOUL-TO-SOUL CONVERSATIONWe often think of "conversation" as something that requires words, but for a newborn, sight is the primary language. When your baby locks eyes with you, they aren't just "looking"; they are absorbing information. They are learning the topography of your face, the curve of your smile, and the light in your eyes. This eye contact is an essential part of their social-emotional development. It triggers a cascade of "feel-good" hormones in both of you. Oxytocin, the "love hormone," floods your system, strengthening that invisible tether between parent and child. It’s a peaceful, joyful feedback loop that tells your baby, “I am safe. I am seen. I am loved.” This beautiful moment of connection is a reminder there is a deep, quiet peace to be found in simply being with your child. Even in the midst of the chaos of "mud season" here in the St. Croix Valley, as the rain pours down around me (literally, our roof leaks lol), there is order in the design. THE FIRST 28 DAYS: WHAT TO LOOK FORSince May is Healthy Vision Month, it's the perfect time to give yourself permission to slow down and simply observe what is unfolding during the neonatal period. The first 28 days are a whirlwind involving enormous change for both baby and mother. While every newborn develops on their own unique timeline (and please, don't let the "comparison trap" steal your joy!), here are a few gentle things to watch for in those early weeks:
This same 28-day window is also a crucial season for postpartum recovery. While you are noticing your baby’s development, you may also be healing physically, navigating bleeding and afterpains, adjusting to hormonal shifts, and learning your baby’s rhythms one hour at a time. If you ever feel overwhelmed or uncertain about what is normal for your newborn or for your own recovery, please know that postpartum doula services can be a wonderful resource. As you navigate feeding, rest, emotional changes, and newborn questions, while also trying to take care of your own rapidly changing body, having a gentle guide by your side can provide such a sense of peace during those first fragile weeks.  BEYOND SIGHT: THE BRIDGE TO COMMUNICATIONAs your baby’s vision sharpens, you’ll notice they start to watch your hands and your mouth with intense fascination. They are preparing for the next step in their journey: active communication. This is why I am such a passionate advocate for baby sign language classes. Long before a baby has the physical ability to form words with their mouth, they have the visual and motor skills to "speak" with their hands. By taking advantage of what they can do ~ watch you closely and mirror back the hand gestures you are using ~ you can reduce frustration and open up a whole new world of understanding between you and your little one. It’s like showing them the "doggie door" to communication so they can pass through months earlier than if you need to wait for them to grow big enough to reach the "door handle" of verbal communication! Join Our "Look at Me, Look at You" ClassIf you find yourself captivated by these early "conversations" and want to learn more about how to support your baby’s visual development, I would love to invite you to our upcoming Featured Freebie Baby Signs parent webinar: Look at Me, Look at You. This class, designed for parents of tiny ones 0-6 months, is part of our "News About Newborns" series and is specifically designed to help you understand the nuances of your young infant's vision and development. We dive deep into how to play with your baby in ways that respect their developing nervous system while fostering that deep, secure attachment we all crave.  Attendees will receive a sheet with practical parenting tips covered in the session, lyrics to songs, instructions for games, and pattern cards you can use with your baby. You can find more details and register on our booking site. This Featured Freebie is a wonderful way to connect with other families who are navigating the tender neonatal season right alongside you. The SUPPORT Framework for Visual BondingWhen things feel overwhelming, I like to use a little framework to help us stay grounded. If you're looking for ways to encourage your baby’s visual development during the first 28 days while also caring for your postpartum recovery, try the SUPPORT method:
BLESSINGS FOR YOUR JOURNEYAs you navigate these early days of parenthood, and especially these first 28 days of newborn life, I hope you believe in the beautiful job you are doing. You are the "mirror" that your baby uses to understand himself and his new world. Your face is the most beautiful and interesting thing she will gaze at; your eyes are her first home. Whether you are thriving or just trying to keep your head above water through the neonatal period, remember that you are not alone. Your story matters, and these sweet first conversations are just the beginning of a lifelong dialogue of love. I’d love to hear from you: Do you remember the first time your baby really "saw" you? What did that moment feel like for your heart? Share your story in the comments below: I read every single one! Blessings on you and your family, Christelle President, St. Croix Birth & Parenting LLC For more tips on newborn care and parenting, check out our Rooted Families Blog or join one of our support groups.
We had been hoping for and planning to try for another child -- so the news I was pregnant was welcomed by both of us -- but I share this story to let you know that holiday weaning -- and an unexpected holiday-conceived baby -- aren't just theories for me! A mere two months prior to that positive pregnancy test, when our oldest child turned two years old, I had visited my doctor to let her know that my fertility (both menstruation and ovulation) had not yet returned. Due to my prior history of infertility, she had advised that we begin to investigate possible causes. However, I had done nothing more than talk to the doctor when we conceived our dearly loved second child. Surprise! What happened? After giving birth, a breastfeeding mother has two different hormonal "sides" that can be imagined as the two sides of a scale. On one side, she has breastfeeding hormones that promote lactation (and tend to suppress ovulation) -- and on the other, reproductive hormones that promote ovulation, and which may lead to another pregnancy. While the timing of her return of fertility varies from woman to woman, and even from baby to baby by the same mother (due to many different factors) the general principle is that frequent and unrestricted suckling at the breast is the most important factor that keeps the breastfeeding hormones side of the scale "heavier," resulting in continued natural suppression of fertility. However, the further out in time from the birth, the easier it is for the reproductive hormones to tip the scales, so that menstruation or ovulation may return. This is part of the reason why the holiday season is indirectly responsible for many late summer and fall babies! What factors contribute to this unexpected holiday-related return of fertility? Here is a partial list:
If, like my husband and me, you are hoping for another baby, then just pay attention to your signs of fertility and enjoy making your holiday baby if the signs point to being fertile! However, especially if your baby is under a year old, you may want to protect your breastfeeding relationship, discourage weaning, and delay making a new baby until later in the future. In that case, you definitely want to do what you can to avoid changes in your usual nursing and sleeping routines as much as possible. This may not be the year to host holidays and celebrations! Keep your meals and preparations simple, and maybe even skip some of this year's parties. Remember, you need to maintain your normal routines as much as possible, so that baby's frequent suckling at the breast remains as consistent as possible. At the same time, be vigilant to observe and record your signs of fertility, so that if you do detect any changes that indicate fertility, you and your husband can still celebrate, but in less intimate ways. If a more detailed discussion of how to protect your breastfeeding relationship during the holidays, how to interpret your signs of fertility, or how to understand the return of fertility after birth would be helpful to you, contact me (Christelle) to book a free online, phone, or in-person consultation. As a certified breastfeeding counselor and fertility educator, I can help! For Catholic breastfeeding mothers, "Navigating the Holidays as a Breastfeeding Family," and the unexpected return of fertility are the discussion topics of our online Catholic Nursing Mothers' Group in November. Reach out if you would like to join us for this free online breastfeeding support group!
8/12/2021 supporting new MOTHERs during a loCkdown: a guide for friends and extended familyRead Now A mothers' group: the good old days? The coronavirus pandemic has changed life as most of us once experienced it. Many areas of the world are in lockdown, and even in areas where things have opened up, as the number of COVID-19 cases spikes again, we will likely face more social distancing measures or quarantines to try to slow the spread (if we aren't already). For some new mothers, this slower, more home-based pace of life has been a good thing. These moms report that being quarantined with their babies has helped them breastfeed, since - just to mention one thing - being separated from a nursing baby tends to make maintaining a milk supply more challenging and if nothing else, lockdown gives us lots and lots of time with our immediate family members. But in other and important ways, social isolation is not great for new mothers. Many important services that mothers need, including lactation help, have been more difficult or impossible to access during lockdown. Aside from access to healthcare, all mothers need other mothers, friends, sisters, cousins, grandmothers, aunts...we need our sisters and our sage femmes to let us know we're not alone; we're loved; we're doing a good-enough job; our kids are normal (usually); and, if they're not, to have faith that eventually, this too shall pass. Lockdowns put a lock on these face-to-face and side-by-side moments...natural social interactions which normally serve to lower our stress levels and restore us - "enhope" us. And all this goes quadruple for new mothers. Dealing with lochia, sore nipples, night feeds, blow outs, the constant guessing games that a newborn brings (a/k/a no instruction manual), keeping a brand new non-verbal human thriving and growing, and caring for everything "down there" is just a lot. In some idealized past, we imagine our ancestral mothers got to lie around while their loving, supportive kin waited on them hand and foot. Sure, maybe that happened sometime, somewhere, but envying our long-departed great-great-grandmother's "lying in" is not really going to help you get through this painful feed, on this lonely day, at this ungodly hour. So let's break this down. New mothers have physical needs. Food, water, monster sized maternity pads (in the beginning), menstrual pads later on, baths or showers, and (eventually) clean clothes. If you love her, ask about these things. If she needs something, help or ask someone else to help. Leave things on her porch, in her mailbox, send it unaccompanied up the elevator, or throw it through her window if you have to! (Or you could just give to the baby's dad, but that's not as fun.) If she's good with her physical needs, I guarantee she has emotional needs. Call and ask about her birth. Listen. Bite your tongue if you find yourself starting any sentence with the words "at least." Listen. Celebrate the good stuff with her. Mourn with her anything she found sad. Share her anger if anything made her mad. Don't tell her what she should have done differently. Listen. Are you listening? Keep listening. No matter what, make sure to let her know how amazing she is. No one in the history of the world had her birth. It was her adventure and she is a heroine for having done it! Call another time and ask how things are going with the baby. Celebrate the joys. Mourn the things that aren't going so well with her. Did I mention don't tell her she should have done anything differently? She is probably already beating herself up about something. If her baby is growing and developing, she's doing a great job. Tell her. If her baby is struggling, offer to help. If she's got other kids, depending on your local situation, you might be able to have someone in mom's social bubble bring the baby's older siblings somewhere outside for a socially distanced / masked playdate so she can visit (whether in-person or virtual) with the doctor, or the chiropractor, or the lactation consultant, or whoever it is she thinks can help. Moms grow in confidence and feel capable when the people around them support their decisions about their baby's care. Be that person (even if you secretly disagree). Being a great friend / sister / mother / mother-in-law, etc., means supporting the new mom's efforts to become a mother, a big part of which is taking responsibility for her baby. And chances are very good that if the baby continues to struggle, even after that visit with [insert name here] she will try something else, and something else, and something else, and maybe, when she's tried everything else, she may even ask you for your advice! Now is your moment. A few days or a week later, call her again. And then again. And yet again. And pretty soon she will blossom and her tiny baby will become a chunky monkey, roll over and crawl and take his first steps, and life will settle and she will never forget that you were there, on the sidelines, cheering her on the whole time. Maybe you never carried a meal to her bedside on a solid-gold tray, but you were there. And maybe she'll tell her great-great-granddaughters about you and how you were there for her when great-grandpa was born, during the time of the world coronavirus pandemic. ways st. croix birth & Parenting can help
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